Giving Thanks

    

     As the first Thanksgiving without Lauren has come and gone I am humbled. Despite the extremely obvious deficit in my daily existence without my daughter here with me, I still have so many things to be thankful for.
     I am thankful that I met a man 3 years ago and fell in love with him. I am blessed that he fell in love with me too and asked me to be his wife. He has been such a support to me these past eight months. I honestly could not have kept moving forward without him.
     I am thankful for a wonderful career and awesome coworkers. I am thankful for a nice vehicle and the capability to always fill its tank with fuel when necessary. I am thankful for my beautiful home, sweet and loving pets, and refrigerator full of food. I am thankful for my great health. Although I need to shed a "few" pounds, I am still healthy.
     I am thankful for the best family around. Even though we fuss at each other at most holiday events, we love each other deeply. I am thankful for parents who loved my Lauren completely even though they were not thrilled with the manner in which she came into our lives. I am blessed to have two sisters who also loved and cherished my daughter as if she had been their own child.
     I am thankful that God blessed my Lauren with a talent that she loved and I enjoyed watching...YEA SOFTBALL!! I am thankful that I was able to provide for my daughter through some really lean years financially. I am blessed that I was able to manage to make it work for her to attend college away from home, she loved it.
     I am thankful that God placed His healing hands on my little girl when she had meningitis when she was only 4...it gave me more time with her. I am blessed that he helped guide me to keep her safe through all illnesses and close calls in her life.
     I am thankful that although disaster struck, it came at a time when Lauren and I were in a "good place" and not in the midst of a petty argument or irrelevant spat. I praise God that my daughter said "I love you mom" not once but twice the very night of her fateful accident. I am eternally thankful that I raised her to be a hugger and therefore I got two sweaty hugs that night too.
     I am thankful that God blessed me with the precious gift of a healthy baby girl 20 years ago. I am thankful that I was the mother of the funniest, most charming, tenderhearted, generous, beautiful, gregarious girl I have ever known. How lucky was I? Because although she is no longer here with me, I was blessed to have had Lauren at all...some are not so fortunate.