Doorbell of dread

4:14 am. That is what time the doorball rang. My husband Kevin turned to me and said "Who is ringing our doorbell at 4:00 in the morning?" It's one of those questions that people ask one another but in actuality don't expect a response. I mean, how was I supposed to know. But I answered anyway, "I don't know." By the time Kevin had stood and was zipping up his shorts (he sleeps in his boxers, calm down) the doorbell blared for a second time cutting into the silence yet again and this time arousing one of our dogs. The one who barks.
The close proximity in time of these two jarring rings indicated some level of insistance on the part of the person at the door and also ruled out a neighborhood prank. My mind started spinning. I feared that it might be news about my parents, both of whom are in their 70's and live right around the corner. My mother had not been feeling well earlier that day. At this point I too shot out of bed, grabbed my robe and headed down the hall to the front door.
Nothing, I mean absolutely nothing in all of my 42 years could have prepared me for what was about to happen. As I rounded the corner at the end of the hall I saw Kevin standing with the front door ajar. He was answering a question "Is your wife Kimberly Jahn and is she home?" the young Florida State Trooper asked. "Yes", Kevin answered as I arrived in the front foyer. As I approached the door the trooper asked if I was Kimberly Jahn. I said yes. "Do you have a 19 year old daughter named Lauren Phillips?"
Now I am an educated lady who reads often and I tend to know pretty well how "things" work. I was painfully alert enough to know exactly what was coming next. Troopers don't come to the door the tell you to go to the hospital. Have you ever watched a scene in a movie where the actor is underwater and attempting to understand what people above the surface are saying? Just floating there in the water while muffled voices can be heard but the message is not clear. At that precise moment I dove head first into the deep end. I realize a lot was said but it all seemed so distant. I remember feeling the urge to glance behind me hoping to discover the person the trooper was really meaning to deliver this news to because it certainly couldn't be me. It had to be a mistake. Words jumped out here and there...."three occupants"..."white Cadillac"...."near SR 39".
The only part I remember with razor sharp clarity are the following words "....they all succumbed to their injuries." I recall later thinking "What a polite way to tell a mother that her daughter, her only biological child, is dead."