Year one, 2012, we decided to all dress in jeans with red and white tops. Lauren did not have a red shirt she liked and asked if she could wear black instead with a white shirt over top. "Sure...no biggie. Your hair can be the red part of your outfit."
We donned our Christmas apparel and my sister Beth came over to our house with her fancy camera to take the shots. After I insisted on many poses and multiple shots, everyone's patience with me was spent and the photo session was over.
I ordered our Christmas cards from Walgreens. When Kevin and I picked up the copies, we laughed and laughed. Apparently the dogs both had shiny eyes from the flash. The answer was to apply a black-out application to cover up the shine. Well...that worked fine on KC, our Rhodesian Ridgeback mix who has big, beautiful brown eyes. But our yellow lab, Nellie, has pretty, light gold eyes. There in the middle of her light eyes sat a black dot. It made her look like a crazed beast. Considering she can be a bit rambunctious and a little crazy, we agreed to send the cards anyway.
Year two we decided to be a little more formal. Red was the main color again for our tops and black was the agreed upon bottom color. This time it was McKenzie who asked to be a little different. She didn't have black pants to wear but had white. No problem...a little variety is the spice of life.
Beth came again and this time everyone was well prepared for how neurotic I can be about taking enough pictures to chose from. Therefore they were a little bit more cooperative...a little. Even the dogs did better this time and no shiny eyes occurred requiring correction. Another beautiful Christmas card was created and sent to family and friends. And again...I was so proud of my family.
Now Christmas time is here again. But my family looks very different. It is missing a key member of the group. Without Lauren, it just isn't the same. I originally planned to plow straight ahead and take pictures anyway but the closer it came to setting things up, I just couldn't do it. I even tried ordering ugly Christmas sweaters, thinking that if I made it funny it might help.
It isn't that I am not still proud of my family...Kevin, McKenzie and even the pooches. But I don't think I am ready for a visual representation of Lauren's absence. I don't need a picture that puts the hole she has left in our family on blatant display.
No...this year I will be sending traditional cards to my family and friends. The pictures may happen again in years to come. But this year we are going to sit it out.
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| Christmas Card 2012 |
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| Christmas Card 2013 |
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